Archive | October, 2012

Comparison of the Newman and Warren essay’s

31 Oct

In Catherine Newman’s essay” I Do Not- Why I Won’t Marry” she explains how marriage makes women an object. When a women and man get married the man is taking ownership of the women.  She changed her name to his and is initially signing her life to be committed to him. The man is the one usually ask for the women’s hand in marriage, he is the one in charge. Marriage has become a societal requirement it seems. There is a pressure from friends and family and society in general to find someone and get married. Once a man and a woman do marry the man is seen as the head of the household, the money maker, while the woman stays home and cleans and takes care of the kids. This is what Judith Warner talked about in “This Mess” About the struggle of traditional gender roles expected of men and women. She also discusses how in France men spend more time with their kids than their American counter parts. This is partly because many more mothers did work full time jobs and partly because, even in families where the husband’s sole wage earner, the cultural context that was leading American husbands to lord it over their wives was largely missing. This is a problem in America because the husband usually is the sole wage earner. This causes a hierarchy to form where the man’s status gets raised above the woman’s, which is not healthy for any relationship. Both Newman and Warren focus on personal experiences as evidence in order to prove their points and address the problem of the roles of both the man and woman in a relationship and parenthood.

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Work v.s. Family, complicated by Race

31 Oct

She talks about how Motherhood for rich black women is a lot different than that of motherhood for rich white women. They aren’t focused on self-fulfillment but on the need to build sustainable wealth and security for their families. She has a quote from Pamela walker that says “my family can afford expensive things, but why would I think about spending hundreds on a stroller when I could help a cousin buy textbooks for college? That is not my world” Which really is true because most of these women come from less or have family that have less so they are more appreciative of what they have and so they think of others before they think about spending their money on lavish things they see the more worthwhile uses for their money.

I do not why i won’t marry #2

30 Oct

“because gay marriage is illegal”

Her point here is at least semi-concrete. the reason being she says that she could have been able to. Then she goes on to say that she doesn’t want to offend her gay friends because they can’t get married. I guess she feels strongly about it because she is close to the matter. Not that i support it but its nice that she cares enough about her friends that she wouldn’t get married because they can’t. 

Awful Injustice: It’s time to pay revenue-earning college athletes

29 Oct

Now this authors point is that these boys are taken advantage of playing with out getting paid. The truth is that is a straight up lie because the get to play a game that they love and on top of that they get to attend some of the best schools this nation has to offer and all they have to is play football or basket ball. These poor African american boys not getting paid good, but the truth of the matter is they get to live good, eat good, get a really good education and play a sport that lets them travel all around the united states. So no i don’t agree with her while they don’t get a check in the mail every month like most workers; they also don’t get a nice big old bill at the end of four years. which the money they saved not going into debt is greater than any check they would have gotten.

This Mess

29 Oct

This piece was about her thoughts on feminism and motherhood. She compared her life in France to her life in the United States and how she saw motherhood and basic gender roles in both countries. She talks about the process she went through to write a book about the experiences of both “working moms” and “stay at home moms”. When as she put it they are both worked like dogs. Which I can agree is completely true my mom has always been a stay at home mom I mean yeah she has had a part time job or two but not a full time job. If you were to say she has never worked it would be a lie because she has never stopped. She works all night and day cooking and cleaning. On top of that she gets us where we need to and even where we want to go. Somehow she finds time to spend with each of us to make sure we are all happy, fed and have everything we need. Then with whatever time she has left she uses to take care of herself. So while most guys work a nine to five she works 24/7, 52 weeks a year, around the clock and just plain out works hard. Which most employers wouldn’t count as job experience but in my opinion there it shows a lot more work ethic and dedication than being able to hold a steady minimum wage job. Basically what this author did was fall into the stereotype’s and in order to learn she talked to real American women that work hard and almost never get a day off. This was a good thing for her to do but the whole article she talked about what she did to write a book. I keep thinking to myself what about this article in this book?

So what do you think who works harder a working mom or a stay at home mom? Or both?

Who works harder men or women?

Where should a woman work in a job or in the home?

I Do. Not.

24 Oct

This essay is about how this woman doesn’t believe in monogamy which is when you are married to one man (or woman) for all of your life.  She list several reasons as too why she believes that marriage is not the right choice. This includes’ because marriage is about handing the woman off, like a baton, from her father to her husband she calls this the “traffic in women”’.  She says how it’s like the trade of property but that’s not true it’s not the change of property. It’s not like oh here is this book it’s yours now no it’s the care and protection of this woman is in your hands now. Her second point is ‘because the religious right and their defense of marriage act use marriage as a vehicle for homophobic legislation’. This isn’t true she only feels this way because she went through a bisexual phase, and the truth is yes it is illegal for gays to marry. But even if you have gay friends as long as you love the person you’re with why not get married unless you’re afraid of commitment. This covers her third point she could have ended up with a woman because she was with a few but the thing with that is she was just experimenting.  Her fourth point is she doesn’t believe in monogamy even though she has been with the same man for 7 years and has a child with him and that’s pretty much a monogamist relationship. They aren’t married but they might as well be. Her fifth point is that she will not be possessed but that isn’t what marriage is about. Marriage is a promise to love and care for each other until death do you part.  She says not being married means we get to keep choosing each other but honestly that just makes separating easier it was never official or legal. Her seventh point is that ‘because they have a kid together’ and she says that they will be in each other’s life’s forever so who needs marriage?  Then she says that they already have rings as a sign of commitment to each other. If you already have kids together, you have been together for at least seven year and you have rings then why not get married I mean come on be realistic. I obviously disagree.

Do you believe in monogamy? Why?

Why do you think she doesn’t other than her reasons that she listed? Do you agree with her?

People Like Us

22 Oct

The United States is called the melting pot and it is said that we are a very diverse nation. That is not completely true because while it is true that we have people from many different nations living here but we segregate ourselves. Even if we don’t do it on purpose we do it just out of habit. If you were to look at your group of friends how similar are they to you? To each other? We separate ourselves based on many things like Religion, politics, race, money and the list goes on and on.  If you looked at my friends you would see for the most part girls that are Christian, republican, and of course college students. Now while I am not saying that all my friends fit exactly into that little bubble but most of them do. That’s not saying all my friends are college students, go to church on Sunday, or are planning to vote for Mitt Romney in the upcoming election. Now while it does apply to most of them we don’t agree on everything. But it goes to show that even I am guilty of putting myself with similar people to myself.

 

Do you do the same?

 

How do you separate yourself from others?